Tonight, I will sleep the sleep of the justified.

Apparently it is now possible for state and local governments to send out Amber Alerts to mobile phones. Individuals may sign up; I'm guessing this is a free service, and yet another way to saturate the public with knowledge about a missing child.

So would I sign up for Amber Alerts on my mobile?

Hells no.

And here's why. When I get in my car in the morning and turn on NPR, I'm bound to hear of an Amber Alert, especially if it's in the area. Then, as I cruise north on the 5, past rolling green hills that feature groves of eucalyptus and aromatic punctuations of sage, I will be greeted by a blinking orange sign that notifies me that, holy shit, there is a child missing somewhere. If I see the child or the suspect's car during my 30-minute commute from Pacific Beach to Mira Mesa, thank god there's a phone number I can call.

I drag ass into work, get a cuppa, and fire up the ol' Dell machine. While checking the news for any breaking stories that may affect the cosmetic surgery or law fields, therefore impinging upon my paycheck, I see that SOMEONE SOMEWHERE HAS LOST TRACK OF THEIR CHILD. Which makes me want to start looking under people's desks, behind water coolers... oh, a good bet would probably be the room where we keep our X box.

So here I am, a keyboard jockey who's sitting inside all day, in the middle of an area known for equal parts biotech companies and Starbucks, and I've already been implored three times to be on the lookout for some child who's become the pawn of an ugly divorce case/drug deal/redneck wager. The LAST thing I need is for this important information to be hitting up my mobile phone. I'm not callous, I just have better things to do. Let's just face it, I'm not going to be seeing this child any time soon, and if I do, I'm not going to call the cops because I don't want to have to fill out any paperwork.

I am not alone.

The poll on cnn.com that accompanied this story asserts that 80% of respondents agree with me. Does it help philosophers come any closer to answering the question of whether people are essentially good or evil? I guess that all depends on how much of an effect I've had thus far.