As are all of us, I am shocked and saddened at the sudden passing of Steve Irwin. Well. Not shocked, per se, as the man made a living by irritating wild animals. And as for saddened, well, I don't know. He made a living by irritating wild animals. But I'm sure he had a good heart.
At any rate, I was driving home today from the trainer (Key emotion during this time: Ow.) and listening to the afternoon radio monkey. She began the "shocked and saddened" spiel, but had to restart several times due to her coworker repeatedly making noises on a harmonica. God, I hate radio monkeys.
Her heartfelt tribute went a little something like this:
"Isn't it amazing? Were you just, like amazed when you woke up and heard that Steve Irwin had died? Doesn't it seem, like, impossible that he would die from an animal attack? Because, I mean, here's this man, who spends his whole life so close to... he does all these amazing things with dangerous animals, he does all these dangerous and, like risque things...."
Risque. Really? I never saw that episode of Croc Hunter. Perhaps she's referring to the South Park spoof, wherein Steve spends the entire episode threatening to "jam [his] thumb up [the] butthole" of whatever animal he's currently conquering. I seem to remember that this included Cartman.
Risque. Please get the hell off the radio, you stupid radio monkey.
Helpful Hint from Funundrum: If you'd ever like to end an argument really quickly, put on your best over-the-top Aussie accent (check out Dick van Dyke in Mary Poppins for a hint) and shout, "Ah'm gaunna jam me thumb up yehr butthole!" Works a charm.
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