Civilization: 1. Uncouth Beach Monkey: 0.

I was just sitting outside enjoying the midafternoon sunshine and a well-worn Pratchett novel, when the dulcet tones of that bastard pissing on my fence roused me from my reverie. I went and checked, and sho' nuff, a stream of recycled beer was streaming down the walk next to our garage. I confronted him, found out he is a friend of our neighbor Mikey, and received such fantastic rejoinders as:

1. I've been pissing on this fence for three years, and this is the first time I've had someone complain.
2. Everybody does it.
3. The least you could do is ask politely.
4. Don't be such a girl about it.
5. It's just beer.
6. I've been pissing on this fence for three years. (mentioned twice because it's funny.)

So now I know his face, and if it happens again I'll be speaking to Mikey about the possibility of extending his hospitality to include the use of his toilet.