I am a servant of the people.

I don't know if that's still valid if I'm a servant of the people for entirely selfish reasons, but there you have it.  A few months after I started at my current job, I volunteered to clean out the fridge every Friday.  We have four floors, with fridges on each one, so I just do one floor a week.  Easy.  I do this because I hate the following groups of people:

• People who bring their lunches in plastic grocery bags, then leave the bags in the fridge with one or two items in each bag.  Old bags get shoved into the back of the fridge by new bags, and soon there has built up along the back wall a sort of solid piece of refrigerator jetsam.  Terrible.
  
• People who can't be bothered to make a sandwich before they come to work, so instead they choose to bring a loaf of bread, a jar of mayonnaise, a bottle of mustard, a container of lunchmeat, a jar of pickles, and a small kitten (to keep them company while they assemble their sandwich).  Said sandwich materials take up about a quarter of the refrigerator volume.  Terrible.
  
• People who can't be bothered to throw a collection of single-serving items into a bag each day, so they simply bring a week's worth of single-serving items to work and store them in the fridge.  5 yogurts, 10 frozen meals, a slither of individual string cheeses (have you ever tried to stack up individually-wrapped string cheese in a refrigerator door?  Now you know why it's called a slither)... these people are probably my least favorite, because this behavior is the most premeditated and carries the least regard for fellow human worker bees.  
  

Anyway, I started cleaning the fridge once a month simply so I'd have a place to put my (reusable, single day's worth of food) lunchbox every day.  I love the measures that people take to keep their stuff from being thrown away.  They'll put their name on the item, maybe the date, or even a "Please don't toss" note.  None of this matters to me.  The only reason I sometimes show mercy is because I get a pang of guilt throwing away perfectly good food in a time of global food shortages and economic woes.  

But I didn't come here to tell you about any of that.  I came here to show you the funniest thing I've ever seen during a refrigerator cleanout.

What you are looking at is a single slice of American cheese, onto which "Anna" has scrawled her name in ballpoint pen.  Anna, I'd like to ask you something.  What are you saving that cheese for?  Do you really mean to tell me that you needed to save this cheese so much that you were willing to find a pen, walk into the kitchen, open the fridge, take out your cheese, and write your name on it?  JUST EAT THE CHEESE.